to me 'drink responsibly' means don't spill it.

that first week at tommy's, only two things cured the perpetual anxiety of the daunting and unforeseen future. going to a bar and onigiri - curtesy of 7/11.

i pretended i didn't feel ashamed or like i was a burden to tommy and soon i convinced myself that i wasn't and found myself sitting at the kitchen table after i got off work, talking with him. 

for anybody who feels uncomfortable about a situation, take note: pretending things aren't awkward makes the other person think nothing is awkward therefor it literally isn't awkward.

fake it till you make it. overrated but so true.

one night he invited his friend, ruben, over to drink at the apartment.

i knew him through mutual friends from the flight deck of the BHR. we drank patron and apple flavored crown. i don't remember much of that night.

i will admit, i've never been much of a drinker, i preferred to stick to good old mary jane, but drinking in a new environment with new people made me appreciate social drinking and gave me a refined taste for alcohol.

there is a universally known cliche that has latched itself on to sailors (or seamen, as i learned they are called now, don't laugh, grow up, you're childish) about their endless drinking and vulgar mouths. i will tell you, there is a verifiable reason that that cliche exists, because even on a smaller than average base, they can still take over a town. hence a few rows of streets and a series of dim alley ways lit up by neon signs dedicated to their overt drinking habits called none other than, sailor town. 

yeah, you read that right, sailor town. an area of the city solely devoted to serving these alcohol crazed american party animals and boosting sasebo's economy by a single sailor spending hundreds of dollars a night.

don't get me wrong, the navy is not filled with only heavy drinkers and thirsty dudes looking for a one night stands. and not everybody who goes out on weekend nights are aiming to get belligerently drunk. there are countless casual drinkers who have something called self control (????). 

i think. i've only ever heard stories of these super humans. never actually met someone blessed with such a fabled virtue as self control. send me your story if you ever have.

but, this branch of the military is by far the most confusing one... see, you have the jar head marines, all the smart people go to air force and end up being the butt of every gay joke ever, the notoriously lewdly boys of the army... you get the picture, but the navy? it's a melting pot of styles, personalities, heritage, and ethnic diversity. 

i met seemingly every kind of person, all servants of uncle sam. everything from a closeted cross dressing man with kids and a wife to a new yorker with a raging inferiority complex and a hardcore drinking problem to a widely sought after ladykiller with a heart of gold and a good laugh. i won't name names, but i met all sorts of folk during my time in sasebo.

the tiny, cramped bars in the alleys of sailor town are mostly owned by filipina women, in sasebo on either work visas or permanent residence. ergo, the name filipino alley. things get rowdy in the streets on busy nights and only when i was with a handful of friends did i ever venture down these alleys.

i've heard rumors that a young man (or woman... i doubt they discriminate) can find ladies of the evening and pay her for her time in a private, discreetly hidden room above the bar that offers such services or take her back to his room. i've never actually witnessed a transaction go down, but i've heard enough to know that if you're feeling particularly lonely filipino alley is where you need to go. 

or a titty bar in sake town - but that is a story for another time.
sake town is on the opposite end of the ginza from sailor town. a column of streets consisting of izakayas, stand up bars, many unwilling to cater to geijin - foreigners - and most popular to sailors: a highly disreputable building of bars called lions tower, inhabited by (so i've heard) by call girls.

friday and saturday nights out in town when all the ships are in port are, in the most trivial sense of the word, is chaos. 

a friend of mine pretty much has the monopoly on sailor town, owning four of the most popular bars. his biggest, most successful, and probably best known bar by all e4s and below is jumbles. infamous for catering to young sailors until their wallets are empty, fights breaking out between people after one too many drinks, and slippery floors due to spilled booze. it was where i went when i wanted to party. 

more times than i can count i've witnessed the effects of too much alcohol crippling somebody there - passing out in the bathroom stall, passing out at the bar, passing out in the corner, passing outside on the street, basically passing out wherever alcohol says so. 

yes, i've had my share of embarrassingly drunk nights to the point i'm stumbling around, accidentally burning a friend on the arm with the cherry of my cigarette, sometimes to the point where i'm slurring my words.

but, most of my nights consisted of a few beers at g rock, talking with the bartenders who speak both japanese and english, occasionally striking up a conversation with another lone drinker, and sometimes getting a new friend out of it. i made a lot of friends this way, just casually conversing with someone down the bar from me.

sometimes, a couple heinekens would turn into a gin and tonic... and then a shot of tequila, maybe a few jack and cokes... finally, two or three lychee chu-his later i'd be jumping up and down like a five year old, begging my friends to stay out with me. (all my friends were in the navy and had an adorable curfew of 1 am.)
a perk of going out in japan for me was not having to drive, everything was in walking distance and completely safe, and if i was a bit too drunk to walk home i could just hail a cab and direct them to my place.

bar life was something i'd never experienced until japan.
the only kind of drinking i'd been around was at house parties with people my age or younger, chugging hard liquor from a bottle or shot gunning cans of beer, because apparently whoever can consume the most alcohol while staying conscious grants the drinker some type of superior social identity. sometimes staying conscious isn't even required, people will still give you props for blacking outside in the grass with your pants off and phone-less and your dignity long since flushed down the toilet from your first trip to the bathroom the night before. 

it's kind of hilarious and awesome, yet also completely degrading because more and more young people think this is a way to be deemed as cool. who exactly determines that you're cool anyway? you're still as cool as the person in the corner downing vodka like they really really hate their liver, if you're drinking orange soda, so.

getting a chance to sit at a bar, order a drink, have it served to me in a - mostly - civilized environment with others there for the same reason as me. it gave me a taste of adulthood without actually being a certified adult. a test run.

i miss being able to just order a beer, even when going out to eat here in america it is damn near infuriating to see a drink menu, knowing i can't order anything besides a virgin margarita or something similarly boring.

something about having such a big "first" in sasebo ties some sentimentality to drinking for me now. 

i had a becks the other night and did a mental kamapai to everybody i spent a night in sailor town with, whether it was with a lychee chu-hi at g rock or three shots of tequila, a couple of heinekens and a bucket of jack and coke at jumbles or a bottle of cheap red wine from 7/11 on my porch with my friend channing, i don't think i could have gained a better or more ample regard for drinking anywhere than i did in sasebo. it loosens people up, makes conversations more animated, adds some color to a regular night.
i wholeheartedly believe that a social gathering - formal or casual - can be improved with a couple drinks in hand.

"i'm giving up alcohol for a month.

wait, sorry. i worded that wrong.

i'm giving up. alcohol for a month."